If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near forty. - Chris Rock
Men lie the most,women tell the biggest lies. - Chris Rock
You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it's your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You're probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you're gonna have to live with the choices you make for the next fifty years. - Chris Rock
I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity. - Chris Rock
We got so much food in America we're allergic to food. Allergic to food! Hungry people ain't allergic to shit. You think anyone in Rwanda's got a fucking lactose intolerance?! - Chris Rock
Women need food, water, and complimentsThat's right.And an occasional pair of shoes. - Chris Rock
You got a gun, you don't have to work out. - Chris Rock
Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing something right. - Chris Rock
Men are as faithful as their options. - Chris Rock
You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense - Chris Rock
Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know? - Chris Rock
Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it's about having a lot of options. - Chris Rock